How To Not Be Exceptional
Of all the many perils of living your life as directed by Black Sheep lyrics (and oh, there are many – including partaking in a menage a trois with your d.j. and extolling the use of the word ‘ho as being short for honey and thus a perfectly acceptable compliment to any lady of choice, including of course, your mom) there persists a complicated dead heat for the most damaging couplet to the course of your life as a productive citizen. As I have absolutely no desire to constantly drink Bull Max unless so strongly under the influence of comedic ghetto mocking that I believe its consumption to be hilarious enough to offset its bitter taste of desperation and first year university, to me personally, there is a clear number one (I pity those with addictions to Edward Forty Hands). Not in anyway to discredit the mess your life would become as empty forty ouncers began to block the exit to your room, I struggle most excellently to fathom how holding high the virtues of the following lyric could do anything other than solidify the unexceptionalness of your life:
…everyday is Saturday my friend, wake up, go to sleep, yo! it’s Saturday again!’
Black Sheep – ‘Gimme The Finga’
As a summer vacationer, I understand both the complete wonderfulness of waking up after everyone else has gone to work and drinking the entire pot of coffee as well as the horrible feeling of becoming less and less capable of becoming world-class at anything other than sun bathing as each pointless hour drifts by. While I suppose that exceptional people utilize their Saturdays to the fullest degree that they utilize every other day, if the majority of us lived everyday as it were the beginning of the weekend there would be little going on beyond browsing for bath mats at Homesense and mid afternoon beers while the general feeling of atrophy that afflicts my potential would thus stifle the ability of anyone to rise to exceptional standards in any given field.
When taken in context of the song, Black Sheep M.C. Dres’ sarcasm is as evident in his mockery of everyday being easy squeezy cheesy as a Saturday to the whip it off the clothesline flavour of the month M.C.’s as the irony of Black Sheep actually becoming flavours of the month themselves. To the undiscerning ear though, the pure elation in his lyrical delivery really evokes jealousy. Everyday is Saturday. Sounds pleasant. When struck by my own realization this past week that in a less street and much less pop culturally successful way I have been living as if everyday were a Saturday in the waning days of my summer of respite from jamming curriculum (and nothing else!) down the throats of teenagers I couldn’t help but think of poor, poor Air Canada employees.
Although I need look no further than Queen and University or pretty much anywhere on Granville for reminders of the footfalls of unexceptionalness, the sad sap A.C. stewards, technicians, baggage handlers and pilots that visit me at the very least ten times a day during my incredibly devoted Olympic Games watching appear to be the perfect example of why I should not live my life as if everyday were a Saturday. Until my realization that these ads are targeted towards the Canadian youth as a didactic tale of how their athletic dreams will fall by the wayside if they give up their dedication and desire or allow their parents to fly Westjet, I questioned their inspirational value. When coupled with tales of overcoming adversity (a paraolympic swimmer with a club foot? Beyond Goebbels, who really has a club foot these days? Am I being ignorant?), the A.C. ads depressed the living bronze medals out of me and did little to pepper away the disappointment that is being Canadian and watching the summer Olympics.
When I boil away the fat of my rambling, a simple equation remains at the bottom of the pot, staring up at me like a fresh litter of guinea pigs after you experimented with a cage ’sleep over,’ a life lesson and a stern warning; everyday is a Saturday = working for Air Canada and moping around complaining that no one is going to play the national anthem at the end of your day. So get up, do work!
